Monday, June 8, 2009

Moving Along

On Thursday of last week, yes, I am very late in posting; we had a very good appointment at the clinic. Everything is right on track and we should be doing our transfer in September. Sabrina has a calendar of all the medications and blood draws that she will be doing leading up to the transfer. Let me just stop and say that all that is completely overwhelming. Those needles are HUGE!!! All the awe that I have for what she is doing for us grew by a thousand when the nurse took out that needle, not to mention the oil suspended medication. I know that most intended mothers have been through all this before themselves, but I am the exception. This is the first of many things that I am sure where I think I am totally prepared and understand what is going on, only to be knocked on my butt by the reality. Just wait till we get to the actual birth, I am still advocating for an epidural for myself.

We were with my parents over this time, because the doctor is within walking distance of their house. I learned a very important lesson in telling them about our plans. As excited as we all are about getting ready to start this process, we need to guard ourselves at the same time. The need to make sure that we have not set ourselves up for an emotional train wreck also has to be balanced with our want to just be happy and excited. Things go wrong, no matter how tempting it is to act like an ostrich in this situation, it is important for me to stay aware of how attached I am getting to this date. It is after all just another date on the calendar.

My main job at this point is to be a support system for Sabrina. Yes, this is our child and the genesis of our family. It is just the start though, and she is the one that is really going through all of the physical process. The most physical thing that I am going to do is a few minor injections (please remind me of this later) and an egg retrieval that will be finished in a matter of a few weeks. I have been reassured a thousand times that she knows what she signed up for and that she really wants to do this for us, and I believe her but I also feel bad for her butt (cause it is going to HURT.) Once our child is born, then I will start to worry about them. I have the luxury of being able to just worry about Sabrina, because I trust her implicitly. I have no doubt that she will do everything in her power to make sure that we have the healthiest child possible.

When we first started this process, I was most afraid of losing the control of how the baby was gestated. Now I am just worried about making sure that Sabrina is treated with the upmost respect, is as comfortable as possible, and has the best pregnancy possible for her. Over the past few years, I have read the same horror stories that everyone else has about surrogacy. I have seen relationships go horribly bad, and I have learned from each of these experiences. We want this amazing relationship to continue, and I feel confident that even the pitfalls that I am not aware of can be overcome. My confidence comes from knowing that we already have a relationship that was strong enough to survive the contracts, and that there is nothing that I do not feel comfortable discussing with her.

We are moving forward!! I never thought that this would happen. During all those months and years that we spent researching and working towards this day are finally paying off.


FET Accompli said...

Hi Jaymee,

I am so glad to hear things are moving along! This is so exciting. And while there are ups and downs on this journey, it is so important that you and your surrogate have such a solid foundation together. The strength that you have will help you navigate this amazing journey through surrogacy.

Infertile In the City said...

Great news! It is a lot that surros do - those big shots to the butt! Don't worry about the egg retrieval/ and little shots that us IMs do - doesn't hurt too much!

I know it can be a hard journey - but you guys have a strong foundation and I am sure it will be a journey full of hope, love and baby(ies).

Looking forward to September!

Meg. said...

Jaymee, this all sounds really encouraging!

Were you able to find out if the PGD testing is a go?

September is rapidly approaching -- I'm so excited for you!

And I agree about the PIO shots. Just thinking about them makes me want to faint. Sabrina is a brave, special woman!

Can't wait to hear about the next step!

Mama-Beans said...

Oh man, I have had a post rolling around in my head for days, and have just been too *gah* to get it out.. then you go and post this! Sweetie, these next few months are going to fly past. The injections will be over before we know it, and we'll be looking at a screen with a little pitter patter heart that stays pittering for the next 90 or so years. I feel it in my soul. Stop worrying about me, and start picking out your nursery wall paper. This is the honeymoon phase, enjoy it!

Kristin said...

Jaymee...I am so excited for you. I am in awe of all that surrogates do for the intended parents and am so very glad you have such a solid relationship with Sabrina. Wishing you all the very best of luck.

Cyn said...

September will be here in a heartbeat!
I have NO doubts that Sabrina is entirely aware of what she's agreed to do and the process it will take to get there. That's what's so crazy about us surros that are willing to carry more than once.
Honestly, the shots aren't a giant deal in the grand scheme of life and we quickly forget just how much they hurt-childbirth is actually more painful :)

I love to hear your views as an IM and I have no doubts you're going to be fantastic to Sabrina!

Amanda said...

you are making the most beautiful family, my dear. xoxox

Gabby said...

great to hear from you! i am so excited for you - sabrina has been through this before.. she knows what's up.. and she is so lucky to have you as an IM. I am just beside myself with how wonderful this is working out.. i know that you will overcome whatever challenges come your way.

Beautiful Mess said...

It IS so exciting! The love you have for Sabrina is so beautiful. She is SO very lucky to have you as an IM.

Egg Factory said...

Best wishes as you go through this amazing journey. Our gestational carrier had my last two embryos implanted this morning, and I can't even begin to thank her enough for taking this chance on us. Will be following your blog to see how things progress.