Saturday, September 27, 2008

Distractions from Surrogacy

Yes, I am still here. Honestly, I planned to post a lot this week; it just did not work out that way.

Some of you may recall that I need to loose a lot of weight. Well that has been going about as well as dragging an ice cubes across the desert. In the beginning of May, I began working out 3 days a week with a trainer. To date I have gained 20 more pounds none of which is muscle. To say the least I am frustrated. I am supposed to see the doctor because I believe that the PCOS is once again rearing its ugly head. A part of me thought that once I finished with the bleeding problems this would all be something that would no longer require attention.

I have been feeling horrible about everything for the past few days. To top this all, Joe-Bob could be away from home for 14 weeks over the summer that may put a real kink in our surrogacy plans. An amazing opportunity one could advance his career in ways that we could not imagine this soon. I am grateful that he has this chance, but I just want to get on with my plans. Of course, there is still a chance that this will not happen as I think it will.

Over the years, I have learned to prepare for the worst-case scenarios. Some people think this makes me morose or fatalistic, I think that it is the best way to protect myself. It may not be the world's best coping mechanism but it works for me and I am going to stick with it. It hurts a lot less to fall from 2 inches than 20 feet.

In order to maintain my sanity I have come up with a new project. I am going to finally rid my kitchen of the early 90's wallpaper. When we first saw our house I wanted to get rid of that paper, so 2 ½ year later, I am finally going to do something about it. This is all part of having something else to focus my energy on besides surrogacy.


Cyn said...

Fun, I love a good remodel project. I tend to re-do the kids' rooms every 1-2 years. They are both sitting 1/2 finished since I got pregnant.
Can't wait to see how it turns out!

Amani said...

Nothing like some renovating to get the mind off other things. (It's good exercise too!). Do all the things you want to do around the house because when that bubba comes, you won't have time.

Take before and after pics to share with us, okay?


Kymberli said...

PCOS has made it hard for me to lose weight this time around, too. Usually just by limiting carbs I can get my metabolism back into a good burn cycle, but this time it seems like no matter what I do I can't budge more than the same five pounds off. I really don't want to have to go back on Glucophage for a while if I can avoid it, but this time I might have to. Ugh.

I hope your husband won't have to go, but if he does I hope that it comes with the benefit of career advancement.

Good luck with the wallpaper!

CappyPrincess said...

Distractions can be a good thing - mine is cleaning. My BFF can always tell if I'm troubled by the condition of my home. LOL -- clutter is a good thing (apparently) while a pristine environment indicates something is amiss. Or so she says. Sometimes it's just that I like a clean house.

Best wishes for the journies ahead.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry your plans may be pushed out, I can only imagine how frustrating that must be! :( And the PCOS is just bloody unfair, talk about adding insult to injury :( Hope you manage to get to the bottom of it soon!


Silver said...

Good luck in the kitchen. Wishing you all the best with your surrogacy journey.

Take care