think before you open your mouth

if you have read this blog, you know that i have little tolerance for stupid/mean people. well, big surprise they are at it again. just so you know the following things should never be spoken:
- it is none of your business how many children someone has. you have no right to comment on this, you are not their medical professional
- for those of us availing ourselves of medical science to have our families, we are sharing our pain/joy/confusion, you are to sit there nod your head and have compassion. we do not need to hear that a dog is a good substitute.
- surrogates are not machines, they are women with bigger hearts than you can comprehend. if you think they should hand you the baby and go away, then do a closed adoption. or better yet wait until a machine is invented, you probably need the time to learn manners and compassion. yes, yes, i know that was mean.
i just do not understand everyone's need to voice their opinions. whatever happened to keeping you mean, nasty thoughts to yourself? just because a child is involved, does not give you the right to verbal diarrhea. fact is you obviously should not have an opinion on raising children, if you can not master the most basic rule "If you do not have anything nice to say, then do not say anything at all."
if you want to tell your friend she looks awful in a particular outfit, fine, this is doing her and society a favor. if you want to tell the same friend that she needs to raise her child X way, or that i was not meant to be for her to have children, pinch yourself really hard, and repeat, "I will not say stupid, mean, or hurtful things that make me look like a jacka$$"
i am going to get off my soapbox, but this just really bugs me. i just do not understand why people feel the need to add to other's pain, and why so few try to look at how the other person may be feeling. just think before you speak.

because the bookstore isn't big enough

today hubby and i go to our local chain bookstore to get frozen hot chocolate. it is steaming hot here and we wanted to cool off. in their intelligence, the idiots are not selling frozen hot chocolate, because "that is a fall and winter drink". hey moorons (southern for morons) fall and winter is when we want regular hot chocolate, summer is when the frozen variety would be appropriate. so i finally get over the disappointment, i realllly wanted my super yummy frozen hot chocolate. there is a 4 year old quality to my tunnel vision on this particular subject.

by this point genius hubby is now engrossed in a quest for a book he has not yet read; there are so few that he can spend hours searching. i on the other hand use books as sleeping pills, so i just read whatever it was he bought a few years ago. i am off on a quest to find a surrogacy book that i saw on amazon. okay, yes i know it is ridiculous to look in a southern bookstore for a book about something so distasteful, i might has well have been looking for a playboy.

i go up to the help counter, where some high school kid, whose parents made her get a job is standing two feet above me. this is to make her feel important or something that i don't begin to understand. now here is the question: do is ask for surrogacy and have to explain or fertility and get the dirty look because i am talking about S-E-X? i decide to go with fertility. "uhm those are back in the children's section."

really that is where you decided to put those, with all the books about children, pregnancy, and childbirth. you retched assholes are really going to make me walk through kiddie land to get to books about how i can't have children. wow, now that is some real planning on your part. you have an entire section, 12 whole rows of christian books, but you can't put the books on fertility and miscarriages anywhere else in the store.

i take this walk, the one through the death chamber, to look through the selection. of course the book i want isn't there and i knew it would not be, but i just had to check for the same reason people have to look at train wrecks.

i just wish people would use their brains for more than 30 seconds a day. then again just because you own a bookstore chain doesn't mean you are literate.

oh yeah BRING BACK MY FROZEN HOT CHOCOLATE!!!!

needless to say I came home and bought the book on amazon where they don't make me walk anywhere to find what i want. hubby bought a couple of books that he read years ago, so i guess he has forgotten what happens in the middle.

huh????

i just got a rejection e-mail from a fertility/surrogacy message board. their reason you ask, you are going to love this. according to them, I AM VOLUNTARILY INFERTILE. who the hell is voluntarily infertile. i am amazed, if i had only known that all i had to do was decide that i didn't have fertility problems. so i am going to try this approach, stay tuned to find out if it worked.

all i have to say with these mightier than thou people: "you have your period for month after month since you were 12. stand up and go blind, deaf, and loose all balance. be so exhausted that you can't get out of bed or get anything done if you manage to make it to the chair. then tell me that this was voluntary."

so here is a rule: this is a tough enough process, don't make it any harder.

some people just make it too easy. at some point you here so many of these that you just have to laugh at them. my new favorite, amanda wrote on hazel's blog (link to the right) "having a child is just like getting another dog." really, since when did your puppy look at you and tell you they loved you. yes puppy breath is awesome, but it doesn't hold a candle to baby head. so please keep your stupid comments coming, they are such comic relief. i just hope that you find them just a comforting when you are hurting.